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Lady & The Bomb (aka #144 CRAPPY DAY) "Bernice sends her love --- for whatever it's worth." In this episode, Fish stops by to use the john and remind everyone that life sucks, we see the resolution of Ripner v. Harris, concerning the novel, "Blood on the Badge", and Doris Carlise holds the squad hostage with a home made bomb. It must be Monday. It's been three years since his retirement, but Philip K. Fish is back at the old 1 - 2 for no real reason. Bernice's kind devotion still drives him up the wall, especially now that the foster children have been placed back into the system, due to budget cuts. Don't worry about the kids, though. Jilly's pregnant and married, in that order, and Victor won't be tried as an adult for the assault and battery charges. Fish tells Barney that he's now "in to leather", meaning he's taking a class in crafts at Brooklyn Community College. Detective Harris is having such a crappy day it should have been the episodes title, so you'll see I've added it. Despite discrediting Ripners's star witness (our favorite Captain Barney Miller) by bringin up his recent incarceration, Harris loses $320,000 in the suit. So it's really not a big deal, you see, when he walks into a hostage situation.

Now, for poor dear Mrs. Carlise, who wants nothing more than for her husband to come home and pin her to the matress. It seems that he's a lowly hospital laboratory technician, being exposed to the nuclear medicine departments stored radioactive waste. She maintains this is the only possible cause for his lethargy and inability to perform. With a book called Recipes for the Revolution, she whips up a cassarole of mineral electrolytes and gelatin with a dry cell battery and holds Barney and the gang hostage. They have 2 hours to convience the hospital to transport the waste to a dump site or she'll very politely kill them all. The big problem? No one wants the waste, due in part to the hospitals previous transport of improperly stored nuclear material. Barney and Wojo pursue the matter as aggressively as possible, but it is outside their jurisdiction, as matters there often are. Unfortunately. it isnt against the law for the hospital to expose it's employees to the materials, just immoral. The problem is no more settled in this episode than it is today, but Fish does convience Mrs. Carlise that the radiation isn't affecting her husband, he's just getting old. A topic, as we well know by now, is Fish's favorite.